Body Victories

Over on my other blog, Refuse to Regain, my web partner Barbara asked readers what kinds of things they could do with their reduced bodies that they couldn’t do before. I’ve thought about it a lot since she posed the question and it seems every day I add things to my list – some very small and some quite significant.

I’m calling my list “Lynn’s Body Victories.” Entries include the obvious ones like fitting in the bathtub and sitting on my husband’s lap without suffocating him. However, I’ve also added a few less obvious ones, things I’d forgotten I couldn’t do or hadn’t paid close attention to until Barbara asked the question. I wanted to share a few of them with you in hopes that you’ll collate your own list of Body Victories and add to it at every step of your weight loss and maintenance journey.

The last few days have been a steam bath here in western PA. Temps in the upper 80s and low 90s with high humidity. I used to hate summer at any weight over 200 pounds. Absolutely dreaded it. Nothing put me in a bad mood faster than the heat. Anything above 85 degrees was a challenge to my respiratory system and sweat glands. It took a lot to cool me off. When most people went on vacation, I planned my activities around places with air conditioning. I avoided, as best I could, amusement parks, zoos, or any place where I had to walk in the sun. I was miserable and sad when it was hot and humid.

This latest heat wave, though, reminded me that the last few summers haven’t been so bad. In fact, I like being warm. I don’t mind sweating. I enjoy sitting on the porch in the afternoon and the deck in the evenings. I don’t want to be inside in the air conditioning. I prefer to sleep when it’s cool and so I sleep with the air on when it’s warm and muggy at night, but my days are better now a million fold.

One of the little things I added to my list was painting my toenails. I remember very well the days when that wasn’t comfortable or even possible. Bending over when my stomach was so large cut off my breath. Hardly worth pretty toenails. It was a pleasure to give myself a pedicure last night on the deck.

Lastly, I wore spandex bike shorts on our bike ride this morning without covering up with a loose pair of shorts. Even last year I wouldn’t have worn spandex in public because I thought, “What would people think if they saw my loose inner thigh skin? They’d react in shock and horror, no doubt!” So silly. This year, I don’t give a crap what people think about me in spandex. In fact, I’m only concerned how I feel in spandex and I think I look pretty darn good. Body Victory!

At the 8-mile mark of the particular ride my husband and I did today, the point at which we turn around and head back, there’s a significant hill. We downshift to a low gear and peddle our legs off. At the top, we’re breathing hard, reaching for our water bottles and feeling pretty damn good because we know we saved the best for last: coasting down the hill we just climbed. As I soared down that hill this morning, the wind in my face and my tires whirring under me, I celebrated the hill I climbed to lose 168 pounds because it’s been worth every fun downhill glide since then.

What’s on your Body Victory list? What do you hope to add to your Body Victory list?

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Suggestions for the Blog Roll

I'm finally getting caught up on my favorite blog reading, and I've also discovered a few new ones that I really like, too.

First up, Muata Kamdibe. He was recently featured on FitNation over on CNN, same place I was back in February. His website, Mr. Low Body Fat's Blog, is very motivating, not to mention Muata is easy on the eyes ;)

Next, DietGirl. I was THRILLED when Shauna Reid posted a comment yesterday on our Refuse To Regain blog. Shauna is the author of "The Amazing Adventures of DietGirl!" and the blogger in charge at DietGirl. Shauna is a fabulously successful maintainer, plus she has a great sense of humor. She reminds me that I don't have to be so freaking serious about weight all the time.

Who are your must-read weight-loss or maintenance bloggers? Any informational websites you visit often? I'd love to expand my blog roll to include some of your favorites. As always, post a comment or send me an email.

Thanks!!

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My Bracelet

A lot gets written by people who are losing or who have lost weight, me included, about their clothing sizes and how great/wonderful/awesome it is to get to a certain size. But I thought today, as I was working out with my hand weights: what about the jewelry?

I don't like to wear much jewelry. On the rare occasion when I put in earrings, I develop an infection once I take them out. My wedding ring is bent out of shape because of the 25-pound weight I hold when I do a particular ab set because I always forget to take it off.

I do, however, wear a braided white gold bracelet on my right arm. My daughter gave it to me when I was 300 pounds. I couldn't wear it then, but I'd try it on periodically, as I lost weight, and once it fit, I never took it off. Wait. I take that back. I took it off on Oprah because they asked me to. But I slipped it into my boot and put it back on as soon as the taping was over.

That bracelet is a constant reminder of where I've been and where I am. It dangles on my arm with every movement, like a whisper in my ear: "I will always fit your wrist if you stay the course and treat yourself with respect."

My massage therapist moves it aside when she works my arms. I let it roll back and forth when I lift weights. It doesn't match every outfit I wear, but I don't care. It's a symbol, like a tattoo, and I love how it feels rolling around on my wrist.

My wedding ring is an important symbol, too, albeit not because of weight loss, but because of love. I had it re-sized at every significant weight loss because I couldn't be without it. I went from a size 9 finger to a 5, and the gold is probably very worn and couldn't stand much more sizing, but I needed it there on my left hand to remind me that my best friend was always rooting for me.

Next up, I have to re-size my mother's ring. My kids bought it for me when I weighed 260 or so, and it's too big for my ring finger yet too small for my middle or index finger. I'm feeling a strong need to wear it, though, so one of my errands this week is to our jeweler downtown.

Do you have jewelry like that, too? Is there some significant piece you like or need to wear?

P.S. I didn't feel as ooogie watching Oprah today as I did in November. Whew!!

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Workout Clothes (and an Oprah reminder)

If you haven't seen the "Oprah" show I was on in November, it will re-air this Monday, June 2. The show is truly inspirational and I often wondered why I was chosen to be on when there were so many awesome people on the show who lost a LOT more weight than me, all through diet and exercise. Their stories are incredible. I hope you'll give it a look. (To read about my Oprah experience, click here.)

On to the workout clothes section of this entry.

My hands-down favorite workout clothes company is Under Armour. Their stuff is expensive and so I only own three items - yoga pants, tank top and t-shirt - but I wear the hell out of them. When I sweat in ordinary cotton, I get really cold when I'm done working out because the clothes stay wet for so long. I don't know how, but UA dries faster and keeps me warmer.

This morning I decided to work out in shorts since I'll be working out at home. I'd never wear shorts to a gym for the big reason I'm sure you can guess: jiggly inner thigh skin. It's not real attractive and yes, I'm vain that way. A lesser reason for not wearing shorts to the gym is that my legs look like...well...scrawny chicken legs. I'm laughing as I tell you this, so don't think I'm being too harsh on myself. They're long and don't really match my short torso, and with knees like mine (you've all seen the photo, right?), my legs really aren't my most attractive asset unless they're covered with tights or tight jeans and boots. (I swear that's why I got picked for the Oprah show.)

Bras. Oy. I've tried workout bras, but they squish what little boobies I have so flat that they're uncomfortable. I hate feeling bound in. Besides, very few bras in my size (34A or 34B) account for loose skin under the arms. I wish they made bras with wider bands. Why do bra designers assume everyone with a 34-inch chest can be held together with string? Drives me nuts.

Anyway, so I work out in underwire bras, some padded, some not - again, it depends on if I'm going to the gym. I don't like to be all "headlights" at the gym, you know? The underwires are a bit uncomfortable, but not as bad as the exercise bras.

Shoes. I just bought a new pair of Asics. They are wider at the top and fit me snugly in the back, not an easy find in a shoe. There's very little leather or binding straps on these shoes, which is good. My feet have never been happier. I should go back to that store and get four more pairs. You know I'll never be able to find this exact type of shoe again.

So what do you all wear when you workout? Any favorites you want to pass along? Any bra advice? As always, post a comment or send me an email! Thanks for reading!
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Announcing the launch of my new website: “Refuse to Regain: Providing a supportive and educational online community dedicated to helping you maintain your weight loss”. I’ve been working on this along with my website partner, Dr. Barbara Berkeley, for a few months now. The blog is in its infancy and will evolve over time, and one day become a “real” website and not just a blog. Check it out and give us your feedback. Join the discussion board! Ask questions! We’d love to hear from you.

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Getting 'Out' of a Mindset and Adopting a New One

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about a question a reader asked a few weeks ago: “What can I do to get out of the mindset of wanting to see immediate results?” I totally relate to that feeling and still find myself wandering into that mindset with other of my life journeys or decisions. Thinking about my answer has renewed my conviction that slower is better. Here’s why.

When I first started losing weight, especially the first 50 pounds, I was highly motivated. Almost too motivated. There were some days I felt so desperate to get the fat off that I’d chastise myself for the following: 1) putting on the pounds in the first place; 2) waiting so long to start doing something about it; and 3) not getting it off faster. I’d get this really anxious feeling throughout my body, like I couldn’t get the fat off fast enough, like a centipede was crawling up my leg. “Get it off me!” I screamed in my head.

I spent way too much time being angry and judgmental, too. I’m sure this will sound familiar: You get on the scale and see you’ve lost a pound or two, so you’re a “good” person. You get on the scale and you’ve stayed the same, lost “only” point something or, God forbid, gained, so now you’re a “bad” person. I still struggle with this. I’m “good” if I eat or exercise perfectly and I’m “bad” if I don’t. I’m always reminding myself that I’m on a lifelong journey of eating well and exercising, not just a day trip.

I’m not a bad person if I don’t feel like going to the gym. Rather than have that emotional knock down drag out and calling myself names, I’m learning to ask myself, “Why don’t I want to go to the gym?” The answer that emerges is never “Because I’m a bad person.” The answer is always something tangible like I don’t feel well or something is on my mind that is distracting me. Those are issues I can deal with. Calling myself a name does nothing more than make me feel worse than I already do. This also works when you see a number you don’t like on the scale. Instead of judging, ask yourself, “OK, what are some of the reasons this is the number I’m seeing?” Work with yourself instead of against yourself.

When Claire grabs something she shouldn’t put in her mouth, like one of the dog’s rawhides, I take it away and immediately give her something she can put in her mouth. She’s usually quite happy with the exchange if she notices at all. When she crawls toward electrical cords, I tell her “No” and move her to another part of the room that is safe. This often times makes her mad and she’ll turn around and head back in the direction of the cords. We go a couple rounds before I get her satisfactorily distracted with a toy.

That’s kind of how I view “getting ‘out’ of a mindset”. We have to replace destructive thoughts with tolerant ones. It takes a conscious effort to change our self talk from negative to positive, but being fully aware of what we are saying and how it affects our behavior will turn our weight-loss journey into more than just a “Get it off me!” race to some goal we think will make us happy. By being happy in the process of losing weight, by being accepting of our bodies and what they do for us, by appreciating that we’re taking good care of ourselves by eating well and exercising, and forgiving ourselves those times when we don’t, we’re learning to love ourselves as we are in the moment.

There’s a reason, other than the baby’s physical growth, why pregnancy is nine months long. It gives parents time to prepare for the huge lifestyle change that occurs when a baby joins the family. It’s like that with weight loss, too. Every milestone, sometimes every five pounds, comes with a change to our bodies, and we need time to adjust to and appreciate that change. I didn’t start appreciating those changes until I settled my mind down a bit after losing 50 pounds. I bought some new clothes because I was still wearing the old ones, and seeing my body in well-fitted clothes helped me enjoy the body that was emerging.

This journey takes a lot of deep breaths, a lot of patience, and a lot of attitude adjustments. By being your own best friend, by standing beside yourself instead of always running away from who you are in the moment or standing over yourself like some mean coach, chastising your mistakes, you can appreciate who you are and see more clearly who you want to become.

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It's Finally Spring!!

I’m digesting the bugs I inadvertently feasted on during my 15-mile bike ride through Cook Forest today. They were everywhere, slamming me from all sides, but that’s wasn’t a problem. It’s warm, I was on my bike, and all was right with the world. So what that I found a bite on my thigh when I was in the bathtub earlier this evening? No matter. It was a fabulous ride. I only had to stop twice to sit on a hard rounded surface to rub my right butt cheek muscle because I was tightening up, a sciatic problem I developed this year. Go figure. I rode 15 miles in 70 minutes – just a shade off 13 mph; a nice pace, nothing that makes my thighs yodel.

People were on the river canoeing, fishing, swimming, and sunning themselves on the rocks along the shore. I love to watch people lay out their picnic table food, play volleyball and bocce ball, sit around in the sun while kids climb the jungle gym and play in the sand. It’s energizing being out in the buzz of life around a river. Never mind that Memorial Day weekend is the “official” start of summer. In my book it’s finally spring.

I grow mostly perennials in my gardens, but I love sunflowers, basil, violas, petunias, dahlias, pansies and dwarf grasses that only live one season, so they get bought and planted in one big weekend gardening bonanza. That weekend is usually two weekends ago, but it’s been so cold and we’ve had two frosts so this was my first opportunity.

Rather than feel behind, I’m just sucking up the time and enjoying my deck and porch starting now.

It’s kind of like having a bad day or week or month of food or exercise choices. You can’t do anything about the time that’s gone. You start from now and go forward. Every moment, every breath, every decision.

It’s spring! Are you making the most of it? Planting your garden? Riding your bike? Soaking in the energy around you?

You might ingest some bugs along the way., maybe pick up a bite or two, but damn….isn’t it worth it?

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Back From Da'Burgh

Sorry I've been incommunicado this week. My son-in-law was out of town and so I was in Pittsburgh with my daughter and granddaughter, doing Grammy Lynn stuff - you know, buying Claire lime green sandals and orange sandals and pink sandals and dresses to match. We also bought a new bath book, "Caps For Sale," and few books for a friend's new baby. Claire recommended her favorite Sandra Boynton books.

I did well with holding her and getting her in and out of her stroller. My wrists held up well and I made sure to not tax them to the point of pain. It’s not easy when I want to hold that kid all the time and kiss her cheeks. She’s just so addicting!

I went to Trader Joe's with my friend Carol yesterday morning. I haven't been there in at least two months. I have a new food find. It’s the Food For Life Ezekiel 4:9 Organic Cinnamon Raisin bread. It’s whole grain, 80 calories, no fat, 2 grams of fiber and a nice amount of potassium. Low sodium, too. Toasted, it’s the only way I’ll eat raisins. I tried a slice this morning with a little Land ‘O Lakes light butter (1/2 teaspoon at the most) and it was the perfect pre-workout food! Very yummy.

I feel a bit off this week in terms of exercise. I haven’t done a cardio workout in three days. Today I hit the elliptical for at least 30 minutes, but I’m trying to not feel guilty or regret that I missed the chance for a cardio workout on Tuesday. I made the choice to stay in the house with my daughter and granddaughter in case they needed me instead of go to the gym for an hour. I know I made the right decision, but I still, after all these months in maintenance, go into a sort of panic mode, that “Oh my god I’ll gain 170 pounds TOMORROW if I don’t work out TODAY!”

Irrational, yes, but very real and something I have to deal with, think about, work out in my head. Staying present, being mindful…

How do you talk yourself down from those high places? What are your coping mechanisms?

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